While the business partners struggle with conflict, avoidance, or decision-making paralysis, the first-level leadership experiences a different kind of difficulty: navigating power struggles, triangulation, and uncertainty. Their ability to lead, execute, and drive results is often compromised, not by their own shortcomings, but by the toxic dynamics at the top.
1. Caught in Triangulation
Triangulation occurs when one partner uses first-level leadership as a tool to influence or undermine the other partner. This can manifest in:
One partner trying to gain an ally against the other.
Mixed or contradictory directions, forcing first-level leaders to choose whom to please.
Partners using first-level leadership to sabotage or withhold information from each other.
How to Navigate This:
Stay neutral but transparent.If a partner tries to pull you into a conflict, don’t take the bait. A response like, “I think this is a conversation for the two of you,” can gently redirect them.
Clarify objectives in writing. When you receive conflicting instructions, ask both partners for alignment. A simple email saying, “I want to ensure we’re on the same page before proceeding,” can prevent manipulation.
Encourage direct communication.If a partner attempts to pass messages through you, suggest they speak with each other directly. You are not a go-between.
2. Paralysis and Stagnation at the Top Hurts Momentum Below
A toxic partnership often leads to indecision—either because partners disagree or because they avoid difficult conversations altogether. This lack of direction leaves first-level leadership in limbo, unsure of priorities and unable to move forward.
How to Navigate This:
Create decision deadlines. If leadership won’t decide, ask: “By when do you need this resolved? Otherwise, we will proceed with X plan.” This shifts the burden back onto them.
Present solutions, not just problems. When faced with indecisiveness, frame choices: “Here are two possible solutions. Which one aligns best?” This can prompt action.
Keep teams engaged with what can be controlled.If the top is stuck, focus on executing areas within your authority. Progress in smaller domains can keep morale up.
3. The Emotional Toll of Walking on Eggshells
Toxic partnerships often create an unpredictable emotional climate. First-level leaders may feel like they must constantly gauge the mood of the partners before making decisions or even speaking up.
How to Navigate This:
Focus on facts, not emotions.When discussing work, ground conversations in data and objective progress rather than personal dynamics.
Model stability for your team. Even if leadership is volatile, maintain a steady and professional demeanor. Your consistency helps buffer the instability above.
Create psychological safety. If your team fears leadership’s unpredictable reactions, encourage open discussion within your department so employees have a safe space to express concerns.
4. Being Forced to Choose Sides
When conflict escalates, partners may push first-level leaders to pick a side, creating an environment where perceived loyalty outweighs competence.
How to Navigate This:
Align with the company’s mission, not the people. Reframe discussions: “My goal is what’s best for the business, not any one individual.”
Deflect personal conflicts. If asked to weigh in on disputes, redirect with:“I’m here to focus on execution. I trust you both to work through leadership decisions.”
Document key discussions.If you feel pressure to take a side, keep records of meetings and decisions to avoid being misrepresented.
5. Undermined Authority and Mixed Signals
Toxic partnerships sometimes result in partners contradicting each other’s decisions, leaving first-level leaders caught between competing directions. This weakens their authority with their teams and creates confusion.
How to Navigate This:
Clarify hierarchy in decision-making.If orders conflict, ask: “Who has the final say on this decision?”
Address contradictions directly. If you get opposing directives, approach both partners together with a factual statement: “I received these two different directions. Can we align before proceeding?”
Control what you can.If you can’t get clear answers, establish best practices within your team that allow for stability despite leadership inconsistency.
6. Increased Risk of Burnout
First-level leadership often absorbs the stress of toxic partnerships, working extra hours to compensate for inefficiencies, mediating conflicts, and dealing with emotional exhaustion.
How to Navigate This:
Set firm boundaries. Don’t let poor leadership habits dictate your work-life balance. Know when to step away.
Seek outside support.A mentor, coach, or peer group can provide perspective and coping strategies.
Advocate for systemic change. If dysfunction is chronic, suggest structured interventions such as leadership coaching or facilitated discussions.
Can a Toxic Partnership Be Fixed?
All business partnerships can improve—but it often requires an outside force to break entrenched patterns. Dysfunctional partnerships tend to reinforce their own toxic cycles, making it difficult for those within the system to change it.A coach, mediator, or external advisor can help identify and shift these dynamics.
